Laura and Jay just do the darndest things!
Words by Jay Kana
1. We’ve talked about how easy it would be to climb out of a fully dug grave. I said it would be quite easy; I was vehemently disagreed with.
2. White Cheddar KD and expensive hotdogs have been an actual dinner for us.
3. While watching Monday Night Raw:
“Didn’t that guy say the same thing to that other guy WEEKS ago, Jay?”
“Laura! John Cena was talking to Seth Rollins about something completely different weeks ago. This week, they’re talking about something that happened last week that they initially talked about months ago. Come on, keep up!”
4. I have a Ganglion cyst on my right wrist, which has been named Gary. She has a mole on her left arm, which has been named Billy Mole. They get along famously and rumor has it that they’re in love.
5. While incredibly practical (because I flippin’ hate being cold), I get the odd snicker when I wear my man tights, also known as long johns, thermal underwear, or as I call them, my “legs.” And it’s completely well deserved.
6. Many things are dropped, knocked over, clumsily handled by her. But surprisingly, nothing has ever been broken.
7. If I was given $1,000 every time she forgot to turn the light off once she left a room, I’d have several thousands of dollars.
8. If she was given $1,000 every time she asked me to fix that damn toilet, we’d take baths in tubs full of money and dry off with towels and robes made of $1,000 bills.
9. When she gets into bed after a cold night of tending to her horses, she actually shivers and quivers under the covers and it’s damn adorable. Once I’ve gotten past a few seconds of laughing, I do my part in trying to warm her up.
10. Speaking of warming, I’ve been told that my legs produce an incessant amount of warmth. So much so that they’re now referred to as heaters. As in “I’m cold, put your heaters on extra hot!”
11. Not even good ol’ Jesus could find a way to stop us when we both enter a minutes-long-laughing fit triggered by something that was only semi-funny but turns into a, “I’m laughing so hard that I think I sprouted a six pack”
12. Hangry Mode:
Step 1: Open the fridge. Look. See nothing of interest. Close the fridge.
Step 2: Wait between one and three minutes.
Step 3: Repeat step 1.
Step 4: Repeat step 2.
Step 5: Repeat step 1.
Step 6: Repeat step 2.
And so on.
13. Laura: “Jay, there’s this thing about stuff. This is me telling you about stuff”
Jay: “Cool, thanks Laura…”
(Seconds, perhaps a minute or two later)
Jay: “What was thing that you said about stuff?”
13b. The Thing
Laura: “Jay, don’t forget the this thing,”
Jay: “Got it.”
Laura: “Jay, where’s the thing?”
14. Infant Mode:
When one of us says something odd/silly/dumb or is slightly confused about something, the other person (mostly Laura) puts her hand on my face and says “Shhh, shhhh, shhhh. It’s OK. There there, shhhh, shhhhhhh”
15. It’s been discovered that I have about a total of three inches on my body that are not ticklish.
16. There are several accidental naps taken by someone in the car who doesn’t do the driving. Also, I do all of the driving.
Cute cat couple photo courtesy of xaxor.com
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