I like to think I’m fairly easy to shop for. I’m not one of those people who buys everything for myself. I don’t have extravagant tastes, I don’t need the latest and greatest of things. Like Lynard Skynard says, I’m a “Simple Man.”
My go-to gift to anyone who asks is a pair of good ol’ classic tube socks (black for work or white for non-work), a gift card for Petro Canada, or a single pack of guitar strings.
This isn’t to say that I’m not grateful for anything I receive, not at all. Someone took the time to get me a gift and the thought is good enough (most of the time); the gift is gravy.
Here’s some of the other gifts I’ve received outside of the aforementioned:
1. A Bright Green Pair of Jeans
I was in Sri Lanka for Christmas in 1992 and my grandparents, bless them and rest their souls, thought that I’d become a trendsetter by bringing fashions from the motherland back to Canada. I wore them once, washed them and the green bled all over the rest of my clothes in the laundry. FYI: I don’t separate my laundry. I turn my laundry bin upside down in the washing machine.
I would have had a full wardrobe ready if every day was St. Patrick’s Day.
(Editor’s Note: No, that is not Jay modeling tight bright green pants.)
2. Guitar for Dummies
My long-time friend and coworker thought it’d be a funny Secret Santa gift seeing as I’ve played guitar for nearly 25 years, and I actually taught him how to play guitar. I chuckled. But I’d rather have gotten the $20 in cash. The book has been on a bookshelf since 2012.
3. An XXL Dress Shirt
I’m the first to admit that my weight has been up and down my entire adult life. I’ve been 230 lbs. I’ve been 160 lbs. Sadly, I got this shirt when I was on the lighter side of the scale with a “You’ll grow back into it” comment when I opened it.
4. Half a Pound of York Peppermint Patties
There’s this silly idea that confectionary folks have to provide oversized versions of their products for Christmas. I don’t like peppermint with chocolate. Never have, doubtfully ever will. And the person that gave me the gift knew that. The person who gave it actually does like peppermint and chocolate. So perhaps they were hoping for a re-gift of it. Who knows? I think it’s still sitting in one of my kitchen cupboards.
Have you received something like this? I’d be happy to hear about it.
Tight, bright green jeans photo courtesy of fashionjunkie.com
Guitar for Dummies photo courtesy of interstatemusic.com
T-rex meme courtesy of cartoonstock.com
Peppermint Patties suck e-card courtesy of someecards.com
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